Out of all the subjects that we have, languages have got to be the toughest. For other subjects, at least you can memorize the answers to get the grades. But, for languages, you can memorize the answers, but what about Grammar? Writing skill exercises?
That's going off-topic though. The main concern is, why are languages taught using lessons? I mean, it's fine for the first language (English) because, we have comprehension in the exams and so, we don't even have to learn the answers. So, naturally, the teacher doesn't waste time making us write answers or discuss them in detail either.
But, for the second and third language, we just have to memorize the answers. No comprehension in the exams.
I mean, what are lessons? Stories. Biographies. Letters. Factoids. Why must we memorize parts of stories? And if we write it in our own words,
And more importantly, the teachers spend too much time on lessons, and ignore grammar.
Isn't that the whole God damn point of learning languages in school? To make us able to write better? What good is knowing answers to lessons that people don't even know going to do to us?
As far as I'm concerned, they should focus on grammar which is way more important than knowing,
Or
And, based on the context only. You can't add any points of your own,
And, everyone knows how amazing our grammar or English in general is.
Your bed doesn't have it's own shit? Wow. You are missing out on one of the World's best things.
I don't even...
I so wish I learned English from these guys...
So true. India is so gerat.
If that is her in the photo, it would take a lot to make her feel cute...must be a vry sweetie song!!!!
I discussed about finding 'the one' earlier. But, what about marrying her? Just the exchange of a couple of rings?
It's a lot more than that.
Engagement:
In India:
Unlike our western counterparts, we do not propose to the female. Mostly because, in arranged marriage, you rarely meet your bride before you decide to get married.
So, there has to be a proper engagement ceremony. Now, it's not just an exchange of rings. There's a lot to be done. The bride gifts the groom a set of traditional clothing, and the groom does the same. Then they both change into the newly received clothes.
The proper name of this ceremony is 'Rupaya Naral - Sakharpuda'. So, after the exchange of clothes, the ritual is done in a traditional method. 'Rupaya' is a coin (Rupee) and 'naral' is a coconut, so a coin and coconut is given by the bride's parents, to the groom. And 'sakhar' is sugar, 'puda' is packet, so, a packet of sugar is given by the groom's parents to the bride. This symbolizes that both parents agree to the marriage.
Nowadays however, instead of these items, everyday items like clothes, spices, toiletries etc. are given to the engaged couple for their future.
In western countries:
Or for some tacky guys,
Or something similar.
Pre-wedding ceremony (bride):
In India (Mehendi):
After the engagement, the bride has a small ceremony with her family members. In this ceremony, the women have beautiful designs of mehendi/heena drawn on their arms. The bride has a very intricate mehendi, on both arms and both legs. The bride's family also hosts dinner/lunch for the other family members that attend the ceremony.
Also, the groom is called to visit, to feed his bride who is covered in mehendi and is unable to touch anything. And sometimes, in the labyrinth of designs, is the initial of the groom, which he is made to find.
In western countries (Bachelorette party):
Well, couple of things that bug me about this is that bachelorette party is not a word. However, it is called a bachelorette party, not a spinster party.
Anyway, I'm not sure if every couple has a bachelorette party, but if the videos that I have seen on the internet are real (*cough*) I should not be talking about bachelorette parties.
They also have a bridal shower. It's an all female event with food and gifts for the bride.
Pre-wedding ceremony (groom):
In India (Haldi):
Not exactly a groom ceremony, but, I decided to include it in here.
Basically, the bodies of both bride and groom are plastered with haldi (paste of turmeric) There's a LOT of detail to this which I really don't want to get into. But, back when the bride and groom would be living in different cities, the haldi that was applied to the bride would be transported to the groom that is, the same haldi would be applied to both.
Bachelor party:
Pretty much a bachelor's last chance to be a bachelor. Now, there are a few 'traditions' for this.
- Vegas. Not all follow it, but, in movies and sitcoms, the destination is mostly Vegas.
- Gambling. Well, you're in Vegas, and you're about to get married. You're already spending a lot of money, why not gamble?
- Drinking. That's a given when you're in Vegas but still. Although, this time, you drink till you forget your name.
- Strippers. The highlight of the night.
- If you're in Vegas, spent a tonne of money on drinks and casinos, and strippers, you might as well get a. . .hoe.
We know what happens when you follow all these 'traditions'.
Indians take this a bit too seriously. As in, they literally look for a match made in heaven. It might seem funny to most westerners how Indian marriages are.
Before I begin, like I always say, culture, traditions and lifestyles of Indians change from state to state. So, this is based on what I have seen in my state.
Finding 'The One'
Westerners: They tend to start living away from their parents by the time they're in college, and then just kinda start living away when they get a job or something. Then it's up to them to find a girl/guy, date for a while and if he/she is good, then ask her to marry/wish he asks you to marry.
Indians: They live with their parents till they're married, unless they have to go somewhere far for a job. Even then, very rarely would Indian parents allow their son/daughter to marry his/her boyfriend/girlfriend. Wanna know how the process goes for us?
1. The start: Well, it is like the official announcement that the son/daughter is ready for marriage. It is mostly made once the son/daughter has a well paying job. It is firstly made to the close relatives of the family, friends at work and neighbours. Even though it is the official announcement, it's done very secretly.
But, it is considered as the official announcement because, given the gossiping nature of women, they know that word will soon reach out.
2. The basic choices: From this point onward, I'll just discuss about males finding a wife. So, once the word is out, relatives, friends etc. bring you pictures and biographies of their 'candidates'.
"She's slightly shorter than you, has beautiful long hair, and works at ___."
All these choices are, of course, rejected, as the next step is an important one.
3. The meet: No, it is not the meeting of the bride and groom. It is the meeting of brides and grooms. We have events where guys and girls can get on a stage, talk about themselves and the kind of spouse that they want. No personal information is given and everyone is known by numbers only. If interested, the guy can talk to a girl and ask her about herself.
Also, they serve food and most people only go for that.
A girl here is picked for 'further trials'.
4. The first visit: Now, the groom, with his family, visits the might-be-future-bride. Both families speak highly of their children, while the children shyly stare at the floor. Traditionally, the girl serves tea and a snack, cooked by herself. And customarily, the guy's family asks if the girl can sing (for whatever reasons)
5. Then, once both sides like the 'candidate', they go on for 'The Last Trial'. That is, to check if God approves.
So, a brahmin/priest is called. He reads the palms (or something, I don't know) of both bride and groom. And tries to match the readings. I have never actually been to this sort of thing, but, there are 36 readings of each and if all 36 match, the couple has God's blessing. I think anything above 30 is accepted. But, if not, bye bye.
So, to sum it up
We have this amazing subject called Personality Development. It is simply magnificent. Why? Because it's taught using books. Seriously though,
Like I mentioned in an earlier post, the teacher is inappropriate as well. She tries to inculcate good values into us students, but breaks the rules herself. And, we have a written exam based on this subject, of 50 marks.
A little something you should know about exams in India. Your grade/marks all depend on how good you are. . . at memorizing answers. If you write an answer in your own words, using your own intelligence, you have the illusion of being smart and a 0 in your test.
So, this exam was just the same. And some retards actually did memorize the answers. As always, I went into the examination hall with a Y.O.L.O attitude, ready to get a C on the test.
This is what our PD (Personality Development) book is like. We have the text first.
And then Q&A after the text.
And in a class of PD, all we do is, reading of the text, and completion of the exercises. How? The teacher dictates the answers. Even for exercises that say "What will you do if.." Seriously...
First of all, very few kids will actually do that. Most would just laugh along.
And second, even while dictating answers, the teacher can't use proper English.
Remember how I said you have to write every answer word to word in the exam? Well, guess what? The questions asked in the exam, don't exist in our textbook.
And if the teacher actually does want our opinion, how does she plan on marking the answers? I mean, it's my opinion, what right does she have to judge?
The way they teach every student to take up the same values, it's as if they want to mass produce one kind of student, that is, a dumb idiot who has not learned a single thing yet tops the exams because he has the ultimate power (and time) of memorizing.
Another interesting exam we have for our boards is P.T (Physical Training)
Now, you'd think we'd have some actual theory about health and fitness. But, no. Most of the syllabus is:
- Measurements of fields of various sports.
- Theory of sports, as in, roles and basic rules.
- Instructions on executing yogasana (yoga techniques)
Honestly, the only thing in our book that is related to Physical Training is how to calculate BMI (Body mass index) and waist to hip ratio. And a little information on body management skills and nutrition.
Other than that, it's completely useless theory.
Sure, no one really studies for these subjects but, if you fail this subject, you have to repeat the year.
Another exam we have is Work Experience, which for our school is Food Science.
For starters, food science is a REALLY bad topic for work experience because very few children go into the food industry. Something related to machines (engineering) or biology would have been better considering the amount of engineers and doctors. But, our teacher likes food, so we're stuck with food.
What's worse is, it's theory about food. It's not like we don't already know what they teach, it's just that we know it in our mother tongue, which makes it difficult to remember all the english terms. Plus, it's not like the exam is easy either. We have to memorize recipes and write them down. Even professional chefs don't learn their recipes for Gods' sake...they just remember it because of repetitive execution.
Practicals are the only learning experience in this subject. During class, the teacher dictates notes, tells us to decorate our books and that's that. But in practicals, we have to cook and then explain how we did it to the teacher, sometimes talk about the nutritional value as well.
Again, no one really takes these subjects seriously, but, I think it's a waste of time. Both, in terms of studying and in terms of school. If the time allotted to these subjects (around 90 minutes every week) was divided in science and mathematics, the students would groan but, it would be a lot more helpful.
I'm not sure how many Indians (others are out of question) know about the Ashtavinayaka.
Well, 'ashta' means eight and 'vinayaka' means Ganesh so, 'Ashtavinayaka' loosely translates to 'Eight Ganesh'. A lot of Ganpati followers go on 'Ashtavinayaka yatra'. That is a pilgrimage to the eight temples that house distinct idols of Ganesh, in a proper sequence. And, it is customary to visit the first Ganpati after visiting all eight, just to complete the circle or 'dakshina'.
All of these temples happen to be situated around the city I live in, Pune. My parents had already done this pilgrimage when they moved to the city, along with my brother. However, I wasn't born back then and had missed it. So, when my uncle suggested a repeat pilgrimage, my mother made it compulsory for me to come, but my brother was allowed to sit home. Back then, I hadn't told my mom about my atheism so...I couldn't back out of it.
Anyway, as it turns out, these eight temples are not near each other. And, it would take a whole day to visit all eight. Which means, my sunday was going to be spent. Well, here's a map of the eight temples:
Now, guess what? Here's the sequence:
- Mayureshwar a.k.a Moreshwar
- Siddhivinayak
- Ballaleshwar
- Varadavinayak
- Chintamani
- Girijatmaj
- Vighneshwar
- Mahaganapati
Here's the sequence:
So, a messed up sequence which involves visiting the two ends of the city. That means, 2 whole days are required for the pilgrimage, 2 sundays.
Instead of making the trip easier for the followers that this God has, it has made it even worse.
It wasn't enough to make eight temples instead of one.
It still wasn't enough, so they were built far from each other.
If that wasn't enough, they were given a crazy sequence to follow.
And if that wasn't enough, these temples had a god damn obstacle course.
Hindus have a very popular festival, the Ganesh Chaturthi, which is celebrated in other parts of the world as well.
Well, to sum it up, an idol of the God is brought home on the first day of the festival, and it is then worshiped everyday. On the tenth day, it is taken to a river and immersed in it. Now, some families immerse the idol after three, five, or seven days. The days are decided according to a Hindu calendar so, sometimes (like this year) the festival is of 11 days.
A little history, during the freedom struggle of India, Lokmanya Tilak organised the Sarvajanik Ganesh Chaturthi (literally translated as Public Ganesh Chaturthi) So, the idol was brought to a specific place (like a square or a landmark) and people living around that area would worship it, have cultural meetings and programs etc. The main objective however, was to spread a feeling of unity among the Indians and, conduct secret meetings.
The story behind Ganesh is somewhat funny.
Putting aside the fact that Parvati could breathe life into sandalwood but couldn't fix it's broken head,Traditional Ganesha Hindu stories tell of Lord Ganesha, son of goddess Parvati, who is consort of Shiva. Parvati created Ganesha out of sandalwood paste that she used for her bath and breathed life into the figure. She then set him the task of guarding her door while she bathed. Lord Shiva, who had gone out, returned and as Ganesha didn't know him, didn't allow him to enter. Lord Shiva became enraged by this and asked his follower Ganas to teach the child some manners. Ganesha who was very powerful, being born of Parvati, the embodiment of Shakti, defeated Shiva's followers and declared that nobody was allowed to enter while his mother was bathing. The sage of heavens, Narada along with the Saptarishis sensed the growing turmoil and went to appease the boy with no results. Angered, the king of Gods, Indra attacked the boy with his entire heavenly army but even they didn't stand a chance. By then, this issue had become a matter of pride for Shiva. Angry Shiva severed the head of the child. Parvati seeing this became enraged. Seeing Parvati in anger Shiva promised that her son will be alive again. The devas searched for the head of dead person facing North, but they found only the head of a dead elephant. They brought the head of the elephant and Shiva fixed it on the child's body and brought him back to life. Lord Shiva also declared that from this day the boy would be called Ganesha (Gana Isha : Lord of Ganas).According to the Linga Purana, Ganesha was created by Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati at the request of the Devas for being a Vighnakartaa (obstacle-creator) in the path of Rakshasas, and a Vighnahartaa (obstacle-averter) to help the Devas achieve fruits of their hard work. - Wikipedia
and the fact that Indra's heavenly army lost to a boy made of clay,
and the fact that while all of this was going on, Parvati was still bathing (was probably singing songs in the tub...) the story is somewhat interesting.
So, like I said, the idol is brought home on Ganesh Chaturthi (first day) and immersed on Anant Chaturdashi (tenth/eleventh/twelfth day)
But, here's what Ganesh Chaturthi is today:
1. Ganesh Chaturthi: Day of arrival
How it was intended/used to be:
The idol was brought home and the entire family would be happy. The women in the house would make sweets/modaks for the ritual and the men would sit down with a brahmin for the ritual.
How it is today:
The men get a holiday from work and reluctantly go out to get the idol. Children are happy that they got a holiday from school. And the mother tries to cheer everyone up because she is the only one who is actually happy.
2. Cultural programmes: A kind of event held for people of all ages to perform in front of a crowd, for entertainment (Only in sarvajanik/public celebrations)
How it was intended/used to be:
Well, I don't know how it used to be but this is what I think it was intended for. The elders would perform scenes from Ganesh's life to teach the children about the legends. And the children would perform traditional dances, and sing traditional songs or chant a prayer.
How it is today:
More of a high-school talent show. I've seen 11 year olds try to rap, 10 year olds dancing to a poorly mixed Hindi dubstep song, 9 year old girls dance like Shakira (if you know what I mean) to her songs, children performing humourous plays that aren't related to Ganesh and grown ups singing boring songs.......no, not prayers, boring old songs.
3. Coming together: Everyone coming together for the rituals and feeling united. (Sarvajanik/public only)
How it was intended/used to be:
People of all religions coming together for the daily prayers and talking.
How it is today:
Mostly Hindus with a few people of other religions. And, they just attend the prayers, take the prasad (offerings to the God) and leave without speaking to each other.
4. Immersion: There is a small (well......not at all small) procession for taking the idol to the river for immersion. It used to be small before Sarvajanik Ganpati.
How it was intended/used to be:
Everyone coming together and giving the God a hearty goodbye with traditional music (Dhol, tasha etc) and dancing. And shouting out "Ganpati bappa morya" etc.
How it is today:
Everyone coming together to be a part of the immersion. DJs taking over the traditional music and drunkards taking over the "dance floor". Everyone looking for an opportunity to shout "Ganpati bappa morya" etc but of course, the DJ doesn't stop. And people bursting firecrackers for some reason. Basically, attempts at increasing noise pollution.
So, this is what faith is today. I'm no fan of long festivals but I did used to enjoy the more traditional kind of this festival back when I was 5 or 6. Now, it has lost all it's meaning.
